Alexithymia
(Emotional Blindness)
Do you struggle with feeling anything on a regular basis? • Do you have a hard time understanding or interpreting the emotions of others? • Have you ever been doing something really well — such as beating an addiction or being successful with a healthy habit — when all of a sudden, without warning, you “fall off the wagon” and everything comes to a complete halt?
What happened?! These may be signs that you have alexithymia.
What is alexithymia?
Alexithymia is not a diagnosis or disorder, but a collection of traits. It refers to people who have a difficult time recognizing, feeling, or articulating emotions in themselves or others. People with alexithymia may be referred to as emotionless, impassive, or emotionally blind. People with alexithymia don’t have the ability to recognize the internal signs that they are becoming overwhelmed until they are overloaded, feel completely out of control, or totally shut down.
A few helpful videos about alexithymia.
Very good overview (8:55)
Why you feel nothing all the time (4:41)
Emotional Blindness (8:32)
Understanding Alexithymia and Interoception (7:13)
In-depth explanation (45:19) – long, but good
What causes alexithymia?
The short answer is…no one knows for sure.
For people who have suffered childhood trauma or neglect alexithymia is observed more often, estimated to be about 10% of the general population. In specific groups, such as those with autism spectrum disorder, it seems to appear at a higher rate, with estimates up to 50%.1
Examples of alexithymia
I was auditioning to sing The National Anthem for a professional baseball team. As I was singing I happened to notice that I was standing with the majority of my weight on my right foot. Still singing, I started to transfer my weight to my left foot and noticed that my left leg was shaking like a leaf! I had absolutely no clue that I was nervous!
I’m not exactly sure what I feel about certain things. Sometimes I wonder if I am bothered because other people are bothered. Other times I embrace other people’s ideas (with all the gusto I can manage) because I’m guessing that is how I am supposed to feel. Then, when I’m with a different person I attach myself to their ideas. To me, it doesn’t really matter. I would much rather not have to deal with anything emotional. I’m happy in my quiet space.
I struggle with exercising regularly. I have a habit of exercising for 6 weeks straight, 5 days a week, and then one day I just forget to exercise. It doesn’t even occur to me that I should. I read somewhere that it is because my body is becoming fatigued and I have no idea how to recognize what my body is feeling until I completely collapse!
It seems that I always go from zero to sixty—calm to angry—when something bothers me. I can recognize calm and angry, but can’t identify anything in between. It always surprises me when I respond so angrily. It was usually only moments before that I had just been calm.
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